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Writer's pictureTina Hanson, MS, BCBA

Positive Playtime

Updated: Jun 24, 2021


Positive playtime encourages attachment, connection and joy between a child and the parent/caregiver. During positive playtime, parents typically see very limited incidents of problem behavior. Why? Because parents' attention is a very strong motivator for children and when they have their parent's undivided attention, then they are no longer motivated to engage in problem behavior to gain attention.


However, if your child engages in minor behaviors, try to ignore the behavior and continue playing. If the behavior escalates then maybe it's not the best time to have positive playtime and try again later (when h/she is well rested and after a snack and a drink).


Positive Playtime Checklist

  • Set up a time every day that you can play 1:1 with your child, uninterrupted (e.g., away from other siblings). I encourage you to put your cell phone out of reach to resist the temptation of getting distracted.

  • Aim to have 1:1 playtime for about 10 minutes, 2 times per day.

  • Observe your child playing and join in OR ask what h/she would like to play with. You don’t have to play with a toy per se, you can sing or dance! The idea is to follow your child’s lead.

  • Narrate the play like a sportscaster would narrate a baseball game. For example, “You're putting the ball in the bucket” or “you're rocking baby”, etc. You’re just describing what your child is doing. Don't ask questions, give any directions or make requests. Now is not the time to teach. You can imitate the play as well.

  • Give frequent eye contact and smiles.

  • Socially praise him/her often. “I like the way you……”, “That’s a great idea!” “awesome”, “way to go!”. Being specific with your praise by labeling the behavior that you want to encourage is best.

  • Give plenty of physical touch if tolerated (e.g., rub/pat his back, give hugs/kisses, etc.)

If you see problem behavior consistently during this time, you may need help from a professional to help tease out what might be going on.


Have fun!

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